You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
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