singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
Randomize
