How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize
