I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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