I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Randomize
