just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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