So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
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