I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize
