I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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