im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
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