WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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