THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
40s are totally the cure
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Randomize
