We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
