My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
worst night to have a conscience
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
