i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
