Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
that's an acceptable place to lick
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
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