He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
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