So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize