The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
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