I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
