I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
Randomize