Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
Randomize
