I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
now i know why i became what i already was.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
True strength comes from lack of pants
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Randomize
