i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Randomize
