i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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