Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
Randomize
