if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
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