Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Alive.
So much puke
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
