Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
