Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
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