that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
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