well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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