we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
