My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
Randomize