I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
