Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Randomize
