she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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