White coat. Heels.
I feel like abortions should bother me more
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
