talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize
