i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
