Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize