Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Randomize
