This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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