Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
