Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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