Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize