what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
