She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Randomize
