The maid of honor just puked.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
