Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
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